


Fanfic Poop: Dumbass KneWave Accidentally Nukes Inkopolis

by MinorSmile09



Category: Real Person Fiction, Splatoon
Genre: Angels, Cunnilingus, F/F, F/M, Gamers, Gang Weed, Justice, Lesbian, Lesbians, Loli, Lolicon, Lolis, Rape, Sex, YOUR A KID YOUR A SQUID YOUR A KID YOUR A SQUID YOUR A, ass eating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-17
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-07-13 11:41:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16017164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MinorSmile09/pseuds/MinorSmile09
Summary: KneWave is a real person, believe it or not. And yes, he is a lolicon. Which is a good thing normally but not this time.In fact this fanfic is actually EXTREMELY accurate to how he is in real life...





	1. Chapter 1

It was just another biggy day in the annoyingly sad life of KneWave. He was just playing a friendly game of Splatoon, to drown out his crippling depression.

 

Why was he depressed, you ask?

 

Well, he couldn’t fuck a squid as it was technically against the law. So this made him depressed.

 

Also, he had just gotten banned from the internet for posting loli hentai in a pro-Stalin discord server.

 

But suddenly, KneWave remembered he lived in Ohio! And for some fucking reason or another, bestiality is legal there!

 

And like that, Took-An-Arrow-To-The-Knee-Wave put on his libtard trolling hat, and traveled to Inkopolis.

 

This is where the shit hit the fan.

 

KneWave dabbed and Fortnite danced over a hundred miles to Inkopolis, which was somewhere in Pennsylvania I guess. Everyone he came across on the way there got the fatal disease known as Ligma, and became Super Duper Double Double Triple Double Extra Bossy Deluxe 4X4 Gay ( Animal Style), with extra shingles, a shimmy and a squeeze, burned, crying, and swimming.

 

Upon reaching Inkopolis, KneWave did yet another dance: the dance…of the mating squid.

 

Pearl was having lesbian sex with Marina at the the time, however she looked out her window as soon as she noticed a massive aura of faggotry.

 

“Good lord…I just got done having sex with another woman, and even I’m not THAT gay!” Marina yelled.

 

“The hell do you mean, ‘done’? That was only the first three rounds, I can still bust at least two more times!” Pearl yelled.

 

And so, the two continued their lezzo game of ‘rock, paper, genitals’ with the light turned off, as KneWave continued his quest for underaged squid pussy.

 

KneWave sniffed the air and immediately went into a Slav squat, smelling the ink of a virgin squid-kid. He snuck up to the hapless squid loli and smacked her ass, the squid letting out a loud moan.

 

Pearl and Marina’s inky lesbian sex was interrupted by the unmistakable sound of KneVaporWave’s gigantic biggy balls clapping the small ass cheeks of a hapless SQUID YOU’RE A KID YOURE A SQUID YOU'RE BIGGY THE KID YOU’RE NIGGY THE SQUID YOU’RE CALLIE ‘KANYE’ WEST YOU’RE A SQUIIIIIIIIID AND NOW YOU’RE COPYRIGHT STRIKED

 

KneWave came inside the squid-kid, his dong doing a Fortnite dance inside her pussy.

 

KneWave left the scene and headed to the local library, pulling his laptop out and logging into DeviantART.

 

KneWave cracked his Sonic 3 And Knuckles.

 

“IT’S LOLI WRITING TIME.”

 

KneWave looked up an online photo editor in a separate tab. He blasted the bassboosted 1943 German national anthem on his libtard owning boombox, not really caring that he was in a fucking library.

 

He proceeded to spend the next ten hours making Gang Weed memes and writing loli rape fanfiction featuring Pearl and Marina getting quad-boned by Markiplier, Masahiro Sakurai, Hank Hill and Cory Baxter.

 

The next day

 

Marina awoke from her peaceful lesbian sleep, noticing that Pearl was already eating her pussy. Marina moaned as she busted yet another lady-nut.

 

The two were interrupted yet again, both their phones going off rapidly. They rushed over to check their notifications, however they were greeted with a shocking, disturbing image.

 

They looked to see the horrific sight of Gang Weed images and loli rape fanfics in their DM’s. The bombardment of notifications proved too much for their phones, and so they broke simultaneously, smoke coming out of the screen.

 

Marina stared into the distance with shock.

 

“He has come. The Bane of Inkopolis has risen once more.” Marina said with horror.

 

Meanwhile, Pearl snuck behind Marina once again and started eating her ass, making her moan once more.

 

To be lewdly and epically continued…


	2. KneWave vs. Biggy Butch Hartman

WELL, this is a story all about how, a guy named KneWave came into town, fucked all the squids like a horny clown, and turned Inkopolis upside-down!

 

KneWave had finally risen. His unholy meme powers would allow him to acquire every squid-loli in existence and take them as his love slaves.

 

KneWave burst with light, going into an epically awesome libtard owning anime pose. Every libtard in the room fell unconscious from KneWave’s mere presence.

 

Pearl and Marina both shuddered, physically feeling KneWave’s power skyrocketing to astronomical levels. They decided it was time to skedaddle, as the apocalypse had come to Inkopolis.

 

The angels in Biggy Heaven cried havoc in response to the Biggy Gamer KneWave Rising. Dogs, frogs, dongs and swans alike were all called down by Buddha and the old pagan gods to declare war against KneWave.

 

Pearl and Marina looked to the sky, and saw the angels declare war. With a tongue made of pure fire and a holy sword of blessed obliteration, Butch Hartman had risen again from the great beyond, ascending close to the level of godhood. The last step was to exterminate the unholy demon known as KneWave.

 

“What the lesbian fuck?!” Pearl yelled out in response to seeing all this shit happening. 

 

(Honestly, I don’t even know what’s going on anymore. I just keep writing, I can no longer control the will of my autism!)

 

YTP DUMBASS KNEWAVE FUSES WITH BIGGY SHOW AND THE AMAZING SPIDER-PIG TO TRANSFORM INTO THE LEGENDARY SUPER FAGGOT

 

KneWave had no choice. He had to use his final form.

 

With a cloud of smoke, KneWave himself had transformed…into a loli.

 

Realizing all the angels were getting boners, KneWave then realized he had made horrible mistake.

 

YTP DUMBASS BIGGY KNEWAVE TRANSFORMS INTO A LOLI THEN GETS PILL COSBY’D BY BEN SHAPIRO AND GANGRAPED BY THE ENTIRE INFOWARS STAFF WHILE JAMES JONAH JAMESON DEMANDS PICTURES OF IT FOR THE DAILY BUGLE

 

KneWave tried to run away from ‘his’ would-be rapists, to no avail. The angels of Biggy Justice quickly stripped Loli KneWave of her clothes minus her underwear, and tied her to a makeshift bed by her wrists and ankles.

 

“Please don’t, I have so much internet trolling to live for!!” Loli KneWave squealed.

 

“IMMA SMASH DAT PUSSY LIKE HILLARY SMASHED HAITI!!” Butch Hartman yelled, ripping Loli KneWave’s panties off and immediately going balls deep into her snatch.

 

(Jingle plays)

 

“HEY FOLKS, VIEWER MAIL TIME AGAIN!!” Dr. Pig yelled.

 

“I’m here to answer all of your questions and give them answers! This one’s from Sagan, age 21! It reads, ‘Dear Pig, please get back to the loli-raping before I shove my monster cock inside your piggy ass.’ Well, don’t worry Sagan, that we will!”

 

(Outro plays)

 

Butch Hartman was still Biggy Raping Loli KneWave, smashing her pussy so hard that he was close to breaking the makeshift bed. Loli KneWave screamed in both pleasure and agony as Butch Hartman came inside her, her eyes widening as she noticed that the thousand angels behind him were getting ready to rape her too.

 

A tear squeaked down KneWave’s eye. The next eighteen hours would be filled with messy rape, sticky justice and the desperate squeals of a loli who fucked up terribly.

 

Michael Rosen was watching the whole thing unfold in the background.

 

“Nice.” Rosen said with a click of his tongue.

 

To be concluded…


End file.
